War Report – The Smurfs Vs. KP

Here is the second part of the war between KP and The Smurfs, this time from the Smurfs view. Once again don’t forget participating in the Orkfian Survey found here.

Warreport KP vs Smurfs

It was a nice and peaceful day in the blue world. The Smurfs had been working very hard and normally they stopped working when it got dark, but this day was different!

A dark shadow crossed the lands and the Smurfs stood watching in awe of the great moon engulfing their world into darkness. The Smurfworld was in chaos, they knew the strangers had not come in peace.

For whole their lives the Smurfs had only known peace, with the exception of a few skirmishes. And now the people from in the moon brought the scourge of war with them.

The smurfs needed to defend themselves, luckily 11 Smurfs stood up to protect the greater good of the Smurf nation. Some being a bit blue about facing such a technical advanced opponent.

With the war on the doorstep the smurfs began preparing to fight stormtroopers and heavy machinery, but instead saw 10 dragons fly straight at their leader. One apparently took a wrong turn and ended up H&Ring someone else (That silly Jar Jar ). Also a spirit flew out of that big moonshipthingy, but the Smurfs could see right through him. After the leader got beaten senseless by 11 dragons and a spirit, the smurfs needed a break to build up the defenses again.

———————-Tonk—Tonk——Tonk—–Tonk—– (cowbell intermission)

After the Smurfs repelled the first few attacks they sent a small squadron of elite Smurfs on a mission to destroy the feared “deathstar”, also known as the moonshipthingy. The mission was only a half success, because they apparently covered the hole that got the thing destroyed the first two times around. The plan was quickly changed to a covert operation on the Deathstar. The elite Smurfs saw Darth Vortex and and wreaked terrible havoc on him before returning to the planet to prepare for the retaliation.

The tone was set. We would now feel the total destructive power of semi operational Deathstar. The dragons flew out again with a terror in their eyes not many have seen again, but the smurfs stood their (blue) man. When they saw a Smurf sleeping they decided to move in and killed him with no mercy. After that they turned to our own dragonsmurf that was one of our strongest lines of defence. They cornered him and the evil one with the deathstar and the cowbell (Atan) pushed the dragonsmurf toward a lingering blackhole, where Biltes, who took a wrong turn in the beginning, was. He gave the final blow.

Another covert operation was sent to the Deathstar to kill their leader Jamzi, but the girl cleaverly hid in the bathroom. And we just couldn’t wait that long..

After the death of one last Smurf the war was over and the Smurfs could go back to rebuilding there society. Out of the ashes of the old Smurfempire will rise a powerful race of blue terror machines of which the likes have never been seen before..

PREPARE!! The saga continues in the next ages.

This War Report was written by Lepel.

1. Atan says:

   October 17, 2008 at 19:43

   I sit here in our moonshipthingy and I’m having a very good time reading this. Awesome report lepel!

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2. Bolle says:

   October 17, 2008 at 19:50

   lol lepel, that’s the best war report I ever read. it isnt just funny and brilliant like atans, the approach you take to the subject just pwns

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3. Sweets says:

   October 18, 2008 at 01:14

   hehe – just like saturday morning cartoons!!

   great write, great read.

   kudos to both writers – and both alliances.

   

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4. lepel says:

   October 18, 2008 at 01:58

   The themes helped

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5. Jamzi says:

   October 19, 2008 at 23:12

   haha great report Lepel (sry i only just round to reading it but it was worth my wait!)

   P.S. And how did you know I was in the bathroom -those smurfs are spooky!

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6. Atan says:

   October 20, 2008 at 14:20

   Jamzi, you obviously don’t know the Dutch lyrics of the smurfs’ song (smurfenlied)

   Lyrics and rough translation:

   Normal voice:
   “Kunnen jullie door een waterkraan?”
   “Do you fit through a water tap?”
   Bunch of high pitched amazingly annoying voices:
   “Ja, wij kunnen door een waterkraan!”
   “Yes, we fit through a water tap!”

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